I find myself worrying about my dad today. He’s 82, in the hospital, and recovering from surgery. This is day 24.

The time for worry should be over. He’s made it through the tough part, the surgery; now, he’s just waiting for all the vital organs to wake-up. He’s on the mend. But I find myself worrying regardless.

Regardless, being the key. Regardless of looking at the situation logically and calmly, I’m looking past the good news and dwelling on the bad. That’s what worry is: a thought of bad things unwanted.

So instead of focusing on my feelings or thoughts of my dad’s recovery, I’ve begun thinking about what I’m worried about. “I’m worried” has become “I think.” If I’m free to truly think anything I want—and of course I am—in this case, today, I’ve been thinking about all the bad things that could happen. What would happen if I focused on the good? I wonder.

I wonder when Dad will be released from the hospital? I wonder what his faithful nurse, companion, and wife–aka MOM–are doing right now? I wonder how he’s getting through his Father’s Day in the hospital?

I worry, I think, I wonder. All questions of what will happen in the future. Bad, neutral, good. For me, thinking, focusing-in on my thoughts, expectations and outcomes makes it easier to think positively, optimistically, and hopefully.

We know things in life will go wrong, but why not focus on what could go right?

Why worry when you can wonder?

 

 

I woke up this morning with the “scareds.” With February rent looming, my business is moving forward…and I’d like to find one or two clients with enough work to cover the bills for one month. Meat and potatoes clients I call them. Then the rest of the clients and projects and money are gravy. That would take the pressure off. And I wouldn’t wake up afraid…scared…with the “scareds.”

Being fully awake and conscious of my thoughts, I knew I was hedging toward worry—a negative emotion. And as all students of the Law of Attraction know, when you think negative you get negative. Emotion is simply an outer reflection of an inner thought.

It was time to change the thought and the emotion. I grabbed the closest self-help book beside the bed, The Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire by Deepak Chopra. As I dug in, grasping for an idea that would pull me from worry, my sweetheart and business partner rolled over, “what are you reading?” he asked.

I told him what I was reading, how I was feeling, and what I was trying to do—turn the emotion and thought around.

And then he asked the question that accomplished both of those tasks at once. He said, “Are you worried or are you aware?”

In a flash, worry was gone—replaced by a word that carried no emotional voltage—a neutral word that allowed my mind infinite possibilities. Worried or aware? … Yes, I was aware.

Aware put me in “observer” role, in “decision-maker” role. I was aware of the situation: the bills due each month, the desire to attract new business, the desire to do what I do best—write! Using the word “aware” got rid of the fear. It put me back in control and set me in action.

When it’s time to change the emotion, it’s time to change the word. When you change the word, you change the thought. Change the thought and you change the emotion. Change the emotion and you change your behaviors–your actions.

So…are you worried or are you aware?

Our words create our worlds. 

Positive affirmations, prayers, spells, whatever you call them, what we speak has a greater potential of turning into reality than the words we don’t speak.  That’s why I try hard to never utter words or phrases that I don’t want to come true. And I’ll deny or negate negative phrases when someone idly tosses them my way…like, you’re going to get a speeding ticket–you’re due.  Delete, delete–not me!

Here are a few words I’m letting go of–removing from my vocabulary–now:

1.      FEAR. I’m letting go of fear in the traditional sense of the anxiety and doubts we focus our thoughts on. Someone once told me FEAR is False Evidence Appearing Real.  Translation: A situation only appears fearful because of the interpretations we place on it.  I’m changing my interpretation of FEAR to Forgetting Everything’s All Right. 

2.      WORRY.  Worrying is stewing without doing.  Worry is also a fear-based emotion.  Playing off of Forgetting Everything’s All Right, I’m letting go of the emotional angst of worry.  After all, worry is only a question of what’s going to happen in the future.  From now on I’m going to “wonder” what will happen.  Instead of “I’m worried about what’s going to happen,” I choose to think (and speak) “I WONDER what’s going to happen.”  It’s open with positive expectation.

3.      BUT.  When’s the last time you were “but”ed in a conversation?  And how did it make you feel?  Negated, right?  And how about the popular phrase “yes, but”?  It sounds as if someone is agreeing with you but they’re not.  They’re negating your words (and consequently your opinion and you).  Instead of “but,” why not the word “and”?  “Yes, and have you thought of this?” Or, “yes, and I see it this way.”  AND is a word that affirms the other while opening them to another way of looking at something.  Your way.

Let go of these words and you’ll let go of a bit of negativity.