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T.H.I.N.K. Before You Speak

 

Truth. Truth is in the eye (or brain) of the beholder. One person’s truth is not another’s truth. And, just because it’s true for you does not make it true for me. Can you really know truth for yourself, let alone another?

 

Helpful. “The road to hell is paved with good intentions.” How many times has friendly, “helpful” advice been misinterpreted and twisted into tangled, hurt feelings? Even suggestions given with an open, loving heart can be misconstrued. “Helpful” is also in the mind of the beholder. Just because it’s helpful to YOU, does not mean it’s helpful to ME.

 

Inspiring. If you want to inspire me, keep your words to yourself and SHOW me. Lead by example and I’ll naturally be inspired. Who are you and where are you going?

 

Necessary. Who determines that? Who are you to question my path, my purpose, my motives or my actions? Sure, if I’m walking too closely to the ledge and I’m in eminent danger, I might need a course correction. But who’s to say a fall (or a leap) from that ledge is not the best action for me?

 

Kind. “If you can’t say anything nice then don’t say anything at all.” Words of wisdom by parents, teachers, educators, and philosophers alike, all extolling the virtues of saying nice things to each other. THIS one I believe in and this one I practice. And practice is truly the word, because this is hard to do. Unkind words, mean-spirited and abusive, don’t just hurt the person they’re directed toward, but the person saying them as well. We’re all familiar with the “I’m rubber and you’re glue” defense when someone says something that hurts.

 

When someone says something unkind to you, however, it’s because they think they’re speaking the TRUTH. They think they’re being HELPFUL—and INSPIRING. And, they probably think the words are NECESSARY—for your own good.

 

But what you really have—when you THINK before you speak—is a whole lot of judgment being wrapped up in a KIND words burrito. It doesn’t matter what kind of flavorful, colorful wrapper you’re serving up or what kind of watered-down words you’re using, judgment still comes through—and that’s what truly hurts.

 

Perhaps we should go one step further: If you can’t THINK of anything nice, then don’t think anything at all.  

Our words create our worlds — words I’ve been using since I discovered the connection between intent and language 24 years ago. It was Brian Tracy in his self-help audio program The Psychology of Achievement that taught me the power of the “I am” phrase.

I am powerful. I am confident. I am easy-going and patient. Simple translation: we are what we say we are.

When I wanted to write my first book. I didn’t say, “I want to write a book, I want to write a book.…” I said, “I am a writer, I am a writer, I am a writer.” Through the process of owning it, embodying it, and embracing it, I became a writer—and then a published author.

I learned just recently the fun, logical, spiritual reason for why the “I am” affirmation phrase works so well.

“I” stands for intent. What is it that you want to be, do, or have? What are your deepest desires?

“A” stands for attention. What we give our attention to—think about, talk about, write about, focus on, work towards—comes true. It…

“Manifests.” It becomes real in our life.

Intention, attention, manifestation. Language is the bridge between wanting and having. Speaking what you want, out loud, in words that say “I already am it or have it” are key.

Today when I get the opportunity to introduce myself, I use the following positive affirmation: I am the courageous, outrageous, audacious, and loquacious Lindee Brauer.

Just saying it makes it so.