The world is a changin’. Change is a good thing! Yet it is amazing how many of us fear change. Nothing shakes up an office like the phrase, “there are going to be some changes around here!”

Laurence Boldt in his book, Zen and the Art of Making a Living, says “the fear of ‘changing’ is the fear of screwing up; the fear of ‘change’ is the fear of getting screwed.” The distinction is subtle and valid: the first is proactive–afraid that you’ll make a mistake in action; the second is reactive–the fear that life is coming to get you. Life takes a balance of both–going out and getting what you want and sitting back and letting abundance overtake you.

‘Change’ is a Universal constant. It’s inevitable. The key to handling change is being ready and capable–by improving ourselves daily! Do something every day that gives you more confidence or a feeling of well being–read something new, talk to someone with a differing opinion, get your hair done, take a walk…the list is endless. The goal is to build our self-image so we can handle the changes coming our way–and make a few of our own.

When we make small changes to ourselves, and in our daily routines, we can “be the change we wish to see in the world.” Mahatma Gandhi

I’m deep into study of the Seven Universal Laws of Success. This is my third time (in the last two months) reading Sandra Anne Taylor’s book, Quantum Success. I’m not new to the Law of Attraction, having first heard about it 23 years ago in a tape series by Brian Tracy, The Psychology of Achievement, and I’ve spent a good deal of my professional career as a motivational speaker learning and living those principles. Yet today I’m having a hard time living in “potential,” and I’m wondering what to do with these “negative” thoughts and emotions that repel success (according to Taylor). According to all Law of Attraction gurus, negative thoughts repel what you desire. And today I’m feeling the pressure to turn negatives into positives.

I’m also a fan of Karla McLaren. Her book Emotional Genius simplifies and clarifies the link between thoughts and emotions. She doesn’t believe in “negative” emotions, but in the motivational power in all feelings. Anger (an emotion typically labeled “negative”) is not to be suppressed but an emotion that signals a psychological boundary breech. Anger serves the person who feels, processes, and takes time to understand it. Anger is an internal warning system–like when the “service engine” light illuminates the dash board of your car. This “negative” emotions carries some positive benefits once processed.

Today I’m searching for the positive in my negative mind set, while still working with the Seven Universal Laws.

1) The Law of Manifestation: consciousness creates reality. You get what you think about, talk about, dream about, focus on and take action toward. A good question to ask yourself is: what am I creating now? So, what am I creating now with my exploration into “stinkin’ thinkin”? Hmmmph, an article for all of us to learn from. That’s a negative into a positive–this could work.

2) The Law of Magnetism: we attract the same energy we put out. Our dominant thoughts–plus the emotions behind those thoughts–create an energy field and vibration that becomes our calling card. Today, I’m feeling uncertain–not my usual trusting, optimistic self. I’m feeling…human. Many people live their life in fear–how am I going to pay the bills, what if I get sick, who will take care of my kids? My Mary Kay friends say, “fake it ’til you make it,” but I don’t want to put a happy face over “uncertainty.” According to the Law of Attraction, there is no fooling the Universe. And don’t I have to acknowledge uncertainty before I can turn it around? Maybe that’s all this is–the Universe is asking me to step up and declare my intentions.

3) The Law of Pure Desire: our intentions must be pure, our motivations genuine, healthy, and honoring to ourselves and others. How do you want to serve, and what is it you want to accomplish? I had a keynote presentation today–Generational Communication for the Community Associations Institute–(let me shorthand it for you–love your neighbor!) I’m a passionate, gifted speaker and communicator when it comes to communication topics. I spent 8 years on the road, traveling coast-to-coast, living that passion through keynotes and corporate trainings. I did 8-10 full-day seminars a month. Now, I do 1-2 40 minute keynotes monthly. Perhaps this feeling is the Universe calling me to do more of what I do best? That’s definitely a negative into a positive.

4) The Law of Paradoxical Intent: reflects the Law of Magnetism in warning that we’ll get a return on our negative energy as well. If we’re desperate to make something happen, that repulsive vibration will push it away. Desperation creates the paradox, or the opposite, of the original intent, leading us to failure. Now, this is the Law that baffles me most. How can you want something so badly, and still be denied? And this is where I have to call in the theories of Karla McLaren. What if negative doesn’t so much attract negative as move you back to positive? Perhaps the Law of Paradoxical Intent keeps actions true and on the right course?

5) The Law of Harmony: when we consciously choose to create balance and align ourselves with the Universe, our intention and energy open the floodgates of Universal abundance, allowing us access to all the insight, power, and blessing that the world has to offer. We must take complete responsibility for our daily choices, live in balance, accept ourselves, and let go of control. Maybe the lesson today is just that easy. Am I holding on too tight? Am I living in trust or feeling I have to make something happen? Did I live my passion and purpose today? Oh yeah! Then today is a success and tomorrow will take care of itself. Negative into positive–I’m feeling better already.

6) The Law of Right Action: our energy is self-perpetuating in the world. Value, honor, and dignity increase in our lives to the same degree we promote them in our surrounding environment. The question needed before every task: “is this honoring to myself and others?” I guess the question I have to ask myself today: is this feeling of uncertainty honoring to me? If I believe in what I’ve learned in Emotional Genius, then of course it is! Isn’t this nothing more than a gut check? What’s really important to me? My “negative” with the right question has become a “positive.”

7) The Law of Expanding Influence: our energies expand and directly influence the world at large. Our intentions for harmony expand in the consciousness of every human being. Translation: energy is contagious. I’ve known this for some time. I’ve been thanked over and over again for my energy. I’m very accepting of others–even more so of them than myself at times. I just love people and I’m genuinely curious and interested. I like to listen as much as I like to speak. I think that’s the energy that people enjoy–me acknowledging and celebrating them–flaws and all! I know that when I make people feel good about themselves, they go out and do the same to others. And that’s what I was put on the planet to do.

And here we are at the end of the Seven Universal Laws, and I’m feeling better and a lot more certain. Certain that tomorrow is another day…and that giving 100% is good enough…and that the Universal Laws really do work when you work with them.

Two days ago I woke up and looked different. I seemed to have morphed into my Mother overnight.

I actually noticed it as I passed the bathroom mirror at 4 a.m. I dismissed it as sleepy eyes playing tricks on me in the dark, but when Steve remarked the next morning that I looked like my Mom–well there it was, not just staring me straight in the face, but staring others in the face, too. So, what happened over night? What can cause a person to look like his or her self one day and someone else the next day? And why didn’t I wake up looking like Terry Hatcher or Linda Gray (two actresses that others have said I resemble.) Why my Mother?!

I guess it’s no secret why I woke up looking like my Mother–as the commercial goes, “You can’t fool Mother Nature,” the biggest Mother of them all. My question, however, is: why today? Physically, I’m not that much different then yesterday. I didn’t cut my hair into an “old lady” style or gain 20 lbs over night. So I have to wonder what would have my Mom’s face staring out the mirror at me today? Was it the expression? Had I seen that expression on her face before? Am I at a place in my life that matches a stage my Mother went through?

I’m in a relatively new–just coming up to a year–relationship with a man I can see myself growing old with. Whoa–hold the presses. Did I somehow hook up “togetherness” and growing old together in my psyche and alter my physical appearance in doing so? Or is it because my Mom, still married to my wonderful, devoted father wears a certain expression and I’m wearing that expression myself? My facial features couldn’t have changed that much over night, but wasn’t that my Mom’s nose staring back at me in the mirror? And could my expression have changed based on the experiences I’m having with the man in my life?

I do know this different look has caused me to look differently at my life. Why? What caused the shift? And, if I’d stop right now and look in the mirror, who’s face would I see? Is it experience, is it wisdom? Is it knowledge, belief, understanding, acceptance? Is it a cosmic message from my angels to tell me to call my Mom? Is it a reminder of the similarities my Mom and I have, and are they coming to the surface now because of the similarities I have with my 16 year old daughter. (A raving beauty on her own.)

Steve did tell me I’ve been hard on myself this past week. A little more critical of my appearance–of which I don’t give too much thought. I look like I look. And I like how I look. But this whole “different face in the mirror” is causing me to look at my life. I even picked up Marianne Williamson’s new book, The Age of Miracles, about mid-life transition. Just a quick skim of the table of contents tells me we will be lovingly accepting ourselves and morphing our thoughts to living our best life with this new found knowledge. Maybe this is just time’s way of telling me to take a closer look. My Mom has pretty much gotten everything she’s even wanted in life, and at 74, she projects Sophia Loren style beauty.

Have I too–gotten what I want? Or is it time to move toward it? Maybe that’s what I’m looking at. Or what’s looking back at me: the question–what are you waiting for? Are you ready to move forward?

Hmmm, I think I’ll start with a trip to the salon.

“If you loved John Arends, you’re going to love this blog.” (A paraphrased quote from John.)

Woodmen Valley Chapel was full as we assembled to say good bye to a pillar of the Colorado Springs real estate community. I’d known him briefly–an associate in Springs Best networking group. Every Thursday morning at 7 over breakfast at The Olive Branch, a family of business associates assembled to support and enrich each others’ businesses. John and I exchanged pleasantries on a number of occasions.

It was a card he sent me, however, that truly endeared him to my heart. I’d had an article in the Gazette–front page of the Sunday Business section. Debbie Kelley had done a wonderful job of relaying my Generational Communication info. Carol Lawrence had snapped a great, sassy picture. I was delighted as my friends called to congratulate me.

John’s congratulations card arrived a few days later. He’d cut out the article, folded it nicely so my picture was on top, popped it into a card with a beautiful butterfly on the outside and a sentimental “perseverance” quote on the inside. Across the bottom he had scribbled, “Lindee, Nice ‘ink’! John”

The message was simple, unpretentious, articulately and artfully written. It was first class all the way–and sooo John Arends. It’s that optimistic, supportive, elegant presence that we will all miss most of all. He touched so many lives.

Thank goodness Pastor Matt Heard gave us all permission to laugh and cry, because that’s what we did for the next two and a half hours as friends and family shared stories of John with us. Stories of achieving greatness within the ranks of ReMax, awesome long-shot putts (“If you love golf, you’re going to love this putt.”), a spiritual quest after the loss of his daughter, dedication to his Girls–wife, daughters, and grand-daughters, and an appreciation of Colorado sunrises and sunsets–God’s reminder that all is right in the world. Even when one of us has slipped beyond it.

The sadness of John’s passing was summed up beautifully for me by his brother, Dale. He read a haiku written by John’s mother years before:

“Happy times are everywhere, it’s up to me to find them.”

Thank you, John Arends, for my renewed appreciation of an orange, pink, and purple sunset…and the legacy of words to live by. Happy times are everywhere…not only will I find them, but share them, and relish them.

Growing up the daughter of a devout Catholic–two actually–I witnessed first hand the power of Saint Jude. Saint Jude, according to legend and belief, is the patron saint of Lost Causes. While other Catholics would pray to Saint Anthony for lost objects, Saint Christopher for safe passage, and bury Saint Whoever upside down in the back yard to sell their house, my Mom went straight to the top–Saint Jude.

I have witnessed my Mom walk into a 40 acre field, at sunset, and find a tractor part the size of a bottle opener. I’ve seen her find misplaced checks, rogue house and car keys, and glasses gone missing. All she does is say a quick prayer, promise a financial reward as gratitude, and go in search of the missing object. Saint Jude comes through–almost always, and almost always immediately.

I, myself, have called on Jude on numerous occasions–like when I threw out an important bottle of medication and had to go dumpster diving to find it. Jude has helped me find countless items, and more importantly, has helped me through times of great stress…times when my moral has been in the toilet and I’m standing alone on one last shredded nerve. To me, Saint Jude represents faith…and the power of prayer. From that very first time in elementary school when I lost my brand new retainer and had to call in the Big Guy, I’ve been a believer.

Today I invoke Saint Jude. There is only one thing on my list, and I need it now. With heartfelt gratitude, I thank you in advance for coming through. Saint Jude, you’re the Dude.

And, as always, I’ll be sending my gratitude check to Saint Jude’s Children’s Hospital.

Is there anything more exhausting than having to get up? The alarm goes off, we hit the snooze, and then lie in bed preparing ourselves for getting up and out of bed the next time it goes off.

“I want to wake up, not get up,” Steve said to me one night as I was setting the alarm. It made perfect sense to me. Who doesn’t enjoy a Saturday or Sunday morning when you can sleep until you’re done? Few of us have that luxury daily. For me it’s getting the kids on the bus, or making an early morning networking meeting, or coffee with clients. The good news, being self-employed, I have no office to report to at a certain time–besides my own home/office.

I find my agenda for the day sets my mood and perspective. If I’m going to do something that I’m not highly motivated to do (translation: I don’t want to do it), I feel proportionally exhausted. Just the thought of having to get up and do it makes me tired. Those are the multiple-snooze mornings.

Then there are those days that I can’t wait to get to my agenda–the “to do” list. Those days I wake up on my own–no alarm clock needed–the reason for getting up is also an internal “wake up” call. The day is stretched open to opportunity.

If you’re in reasonably good health, are getting to bed on time, have no external reason to set the alarm, why not let your body and mind determine the wake up time? And get up time?

And if you just can’t get up perhaps it’s not an alarm problem at all. Could the true “wake up” call be the need to change your daily agenda?

I awoke today to a familiar feeling–the yucks. I HATE that feeling! I fight that feeling a lot when I’m under pressure.

Being a student of The Law of Attraction, I knew I had to change that stinkin’ thinkin’ to thoughts that were positive. So into my self-help library I delved. The Power of I AM, a book by John Maxwell Taylor, was on the top of the stack by the bed. I grabbed it and searched for a tidbit of info that would transform my thoughts to something brighter…to no avail.

I then resorted to prayer and meditation. My mind refused to let me see the light. I felt like I was in a fog of negativity. And just as peering into a deep fog does nothing to help clear it, peering into my consciousness had the same effect–or lack there of. I fought it for hours not wanting to acknowledge the problems that were making me anxious. Not wanting to BE anxious! Finally, around noon, after hours of fighting tears and sadness, I gave in and welcomed the problem. As Tama Kieves says in her book This Time I Dance, I invited the problem in for tea and crumpets. “Well, as long as the problem is here, we all might as well get comfortable with it.” Instantly I felt better–a complete turn-around.

How did I do it? One simple little word helped me–the word “well….” “Well” is a transition word, a word that moves your mind from one thought to another. “Well” acknowledges the situation you’re in but still opens to a different, kinder outcome than the one you are imagining. It’s easier to let go of negative thinking when you move it forward one thought at a time. And I do that one word at a time.

“Well” is a word that moves me forward.

Our words create our worlds — words I’ve been using since I discovered the connection between intent and language 24 years ago. It was Brian Tracy in his self-help audio program The Psychology of Achievement that taught me the power of the “I am” phrase.

I am powerful. I am confident. I am easy-going and patient. Simple translation: we are what we say we are.

When I wanted to write my first book. I didn’t say, “I want to write a book, I want to write a book.…” I said, “I am a writer, I am a writer, I am a writer.” Through the process of owning it, embodying it, and embracing it, I became a writer—and then a published author.

I learned just recently the fun, logical, spiritual reason for why the “I am” affirmation phrase works so well.

“I” stands for intent. What is it that you want to be, do, or have? What are your deepest desires?

“A” stands for attention. What we give our attention to—think about, talk about, write about, focus on, work towards—comes true. It…

“Manifests.” It becomes real in our life.

Intention, attention, manifestation. Language is the bridge between wanting and having. Speaking what you want, out loud, in words that say “I already am it or have it” are key.

Today when I get the opportunity to introduce myself, I use the following positive affirmation: I am the courageous, outrageous, audacious, and loquacious Lindee Brauer.

Just saying it makes it so.

I woke up this morning with the “scareds.” With February rent looming, my business is moving forward…and I’d like to find one or two clients with enough work to cover the bills for one month. Meat and potatoes clients I call them. Then the rest of the clients and projects and money are gravy. That would take the pressure off. And I wouldn’t wake up afraid…scared…with the “scareds.”

Being fully awake and conscious of my thoughts, I knew I was hedging toward worry—a negative emotion. And as all students of the Law of Attraction know, when you think negative you get negative. Emotion is simply an outer reflection of an inner thought.

It was time to change the thought and the emotion. I grabbed the closest self-help book beside the bed, The Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire by Deepak Chopra. As I dug in, grasping for an idea that would pull me from worry, my sweetheart and business partner rolled over, “what are you reading?” he asked.

I told him what I was reading, how I was feeling, and what I was trying to do—turn the emotion and thought around.

And then he asked the question that accomplished both of those tasks at once. He said, “Are you worried or are you aware?”

In a flash, worry was gone—replaced by a word that carried no emotional voltage—a neutral word that allowed my mind infinite possibilities. Worried or aware? … Yes, I was aware.

Aware put me in “observer” role, in “decision-maker” role. I was aware of the situation: the bills due each month, the desire to attract new business, the desire to do what I do best—write! Using the word “aware” got rid of the fear. It put me back in control and set me in action.

When it’s time to change the emotion, it’s time to change the word. When you change the word, you change the thought. Change the thought and you change the emotion. Change the emotion and you change your behaviors–your actions.

So…are you worried or are you aware?

Start a love story. Match your friends.

A new ad and website appeared this week–Matchmyfriend.com Brilliant marketing! What you won’t do for yourself you’ll do for your friends—and secretly hope they do it for you. Like a surprise party! Does anyone really appreciate a match-maker? Of course, when they’re not blatant about it. Why not silently arrange a rendezvous? It’s easy to have both people show up in the same location. It’s the darned announcing of “said meeting” that makes everyone uncomfortable. Don’t even start a conversation with “you’ve gotta meet Bob, he’s blah, blah, blah, and perfect for you.” Just leave that in your head, unspoken, and arrange a meeting. If they are “perfect” for each other, then fate will step in and what happens next is unstoppable—because that’s what happens in true love. Something primordial takes over. Call it chemistry; call it passion, but a force all consuming steps in and you’re on a shooting star heading out to heaven. Who doesn’t appreciate a hook-up, no matter where it comes from or who sets it up? It’s just a lot easier to let happen. Love throws its own surprise party.
Read More →